This post was written by Assistant Planner Kristen, who is planning her own winter wedding!
“What song should we play as we process out of the ceremony?”
“What should the ring bearers wear?”
“Cake or dessert buffet?”
“Who will do the readings? Wait, which readings are we doing? Are we even having any readings?”
Each decision tends to lead right into at least three more, building on top of one another like a giant (expensive) house of cards. It’s enough to stress out the most laid back of brides.
Now, enter Kristen: The Most Indecisive Bride in the World.
It drives my fiancé insane. Have you ever seen this The Notebook Meme? It’s pure perfection and is a dead-on match for our conversations each time a meal approaches. At a restaurant, my menu will be open and closed at least seven times before I truly commit, and even when I do – I always have some sort of regretful afterthought once the server leaves the table, order in hand.
“I totally should’ve gotten a burger. I’ve been craving a burger all day. But then again, I really wanted like a saucy kind of pasta.”
I swear, I don’t know how Tom doesn’t just refuse to go out to eat with me anymore.
Anywho, being as indecisive as I am certainly throws us for a few loops in the planning process. And to think, I was oh-so-cocky before we actually set a date. I had a Pinterest board (though, the sheer size of it should’ve been a red flag, warning me of how much wavering I was in store for), I had vendors already in mind, clear ideas, and mood boards – not to mention strong opinions. This was going to be a cinch.
For example, I’ve attended many, many weddings over the past ten years, and I know for a fact that no wedding was ever ruined by not having favors. And so there we had it, we weren’t doing favors. Easy, right?
Wrong! I dreamt up the CUTEST (because isn’t everything the cutest when it comes to weddings?!) idea for favors that were SO US, so perfect for the season, and shouldn’t be too expensive to pull together. My favor FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out) kicked into high gear. And so it is over favors – the one thing I thought I didn’t need to decide on – that we now debate. I am not spilling the beans in the event that we do decide (there’s that word again…) on executing this idea ;)
Slowly but surely, I am learning how to kick my indecisive nature out to the curb as we prepare for the big day. I am sure it will never truly go away (I am an Aries, after all), but wedding planning has been a true exercise in decision making. I’ve learned that, once a choice is made – I really need to just stick to what we landed on. No looking back and no reconsidering it.
The truth is, as much as I’d like to proudly proclaim that I am the anti-Bridezilla and that the “small” decisions don’t really matter in the grand scheme, some of them do. And the reason they do is because each of my decisions is going to contribute to our guests’ experience on December 12th – a notion that is so very important to both Tom and I.
I always keep in mind this sage (and paraphrased) advice from one of my favorite wedding blogs, A Practical Wedding: Your guests won’t remember how your wedding looks, they’ll remember how your wedding feels. Keeping this in mind as I move on to my next big decision!
What decisions were the most painstaking for you and your partner when planning your wedding? Any tips you can share with me?